I think it’s safe to say that Monday is already written off when this is the first thing I see:

The chairman of the House Intelligence Committee hinted Sunday that a battle over an expired eavesdropping law might be moving toward a conclusion that gave phone companies the retroactive legal protections long sought by President Bush.

The chairman, Representative Silvestre Reyes, Democrat of Texas, said in an interview on CNN that the committee had been talking to the companies “because if we’re going to give them blanket immunity, we want to know and understand what it is we’re giving immunity for.”

Mr. Reyes did not specify what provisions a House bill might contain. But his use of the words “blanket immunity” suggested that he might be moving toward a Senate bill, backed by Mr. Bush, that would protect phone companies that assisted in a federal program of wiretapping without warrants after the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks. “I have an open mind about that,” Mr. Reyes said. (emphasis mine)

“Well, I’d like to know whether or not lube will be involved, if we’re going to receive involuntary buttsex. I have an open mind about lube, you can give us involuntary buttsex with it or without it, I’d just like to know that detail. While we’re at it, will it be going in our mouths before or after?”

Somebody tell me this fucker has a primary challenge coming up, please…

Edit: concerning the immunity itself, Kevin Drum & a Washington Monthly commenter “Bmaz” have some background even I wasn’t thinking about: Odds are rather good that the telecoms themselves really don’t care, because we could end up paying any damages anyway.  According to this, the real protection is for the Administration, as the telecoms already got theirs.